You know exactly what I mean. One child over there is crying because another stole her pencil. Three parents need to speak to you about their exceptionally fantastic child. The principal just asked you to take lunch line and cross walk duty and Johnny just threw up in the dollhouse.
Sometimes life can get a little out of hand. When you have mainstream media screaming at each other about "I'm right this, she left that," a family to take care of, a home to maintain, a career to lead, it can be hard to feel or see the normal. After all, we're being told what normal was 2+ years ago and no one is eagerly using the term yet. With the bossing, whining, deserving and complacent, it might just seem like you are running your on Crazy Daze Day Care. I'm here to tell you, it doesn't have to be like that.
If you want to calm the various committees that are pulling you from this side to that side, Follow these few guidelines with authentic attention and loving kindness. I assure you, there will be calm, wonder and delight even in the depths of chaos when your main focus is to get a lollipop out of your hair.
Be Here Now.
You've heard me call them MTO's: Mental Time Outs before, but being present in the here and now can really drop your nervous response to something manageable. You can do this by practicing breathing methods like pranayama, sitting in silence in a meditation, moving your body erratically like jump squats or jumping jacks or just focusing on the closest most beautiful thing next to you. Take you brain away from the crazy and into what calms you.
How to begin: Set your phone timer to three minutes and pick a color. Scan your environment near and far, identifying everything in this defined color. You may be surprised at how rich and vivid your environment is when you hone in on your visual acuity and attention.
Inquire Within.
The monotony of day to day schedules, habits and routines can become anything but exciting. Boring, morose, typical, basic, uneventful, average - these are all the words that come to mind when thinking of day to day routines. People who inquire and who are curious are inevitably entertained and are entertaining. They have fabulous conversations about the way the world works, new industry breakthroughs, scientific discoveries and are constantly learning.
How to begin: Pick up a book and start. reading. No, don't feel guilty and YES, a real book. Stop talking - you do have time, you have plenty of time to learn and invest in your knowledge and headspace. You have permission to skim too! Some of the most successful people in the world are readers - just open up a book you've been interested in and read the first chapter. Then, use what you read to spark a conversation with your spouse or friend. Want to take the next challenge? Do the listening. Yes, bring up the conversation with curiosity and then choose to listen and ask your partner their ideas on the subject. I swear, you won't even remember that the bathtub overflowed an hour ago!
Rituals. Habits. Routines.
Routines are a rope of habits all tied together that bring order and timeliness to your day. I find the word "routine" and "habit" to be a little drab and meh. When compared to *ritual*, rituals are encouraged, wanted, invited. I have never heard anyone say "I am trying to stop my nail biting ritual" or "I just can't kick my snooze button ritual." Sometimes a ritual weighs more in the heart-body-mind or the citta in yoga. If a habit is done to save you time, a ritual is done to save your nervous system, blood pressure, anxiety wheel of thoughts or even relaxation. Even taking a habit that is average and dressing it up a little with some self care and attention can up your habits game to ritual status
How to begin: Look at your day and find one thing you do every single day, no matter what. Then, think about why you do this and what the benefit of it is. Tomorrow as you are washing your hair or packing your lunch, bring the awareness of the activity to all 5 senses, see, touch, smell, hear and maybe taste the what and why. Then, bring a sense of gratitude to you and your habit for the ability to care for yourself, your life and all of the positive things that bring. By evoking the senses and an appreciation of life you can go from drab habit to lovely ritual!
You don't have to have crazy to do this.....
You can apply these to the good times too. It's just especially important to drop into them instead of pushing them away during ties of chaos and distress.
Here's my example:
On a daily basis I perform a three minute down dog as part of my Breath Body Practice. It is an inversion so it's very good for the circulatory system, it causes me to be single focused which is great from a "life is too crazy" and distracted standpoint and it also is a whole body workout which especially tones the triceps, abdominals and glutes. anyways...
When I am in my downdog, I am inventorying what I feel like.. sore? stiff? loose? stretchy? elastic? crackly? stable? unstable? hot? dizzy? I compare to the previous day and I reflect on what could lead to the differences.
If my downdog is better than yesterday, it's an energetic pat on the back! I was good to my physical body and my emotional/mental state and that's where I want to be.
If my down dog is the same or even worse I drop the guilt trip and express a little grace and gratitude. She's still here and standing, putting one foot in front of the other to get into the shower. We're fine. Simple day to day deviations aren't much to fret about but weeks on end could be a sign of something worth exploring.
You Got This!
You can take a Mental Time Out and step away from the crazies that are in your space and world right now. You can modify, adjust and dive deep into rituals that nourish and promote healing into your system. The big idea is that consistently doing these various rituals will lead your life to be more like a charm school than a day care. You can elevate your environment simply by elevating your habits.
Remember, don't over do it and now is soooooo not the time to incorporate some new grand habit that you will just need to drop out of frustration. Start small and bring your awareness to the what and why of your senses and life. From there, you can graduate to bigger acts of appreciation like cooking dinner for 5, setting up a jungle gym or driving lessons!
If you are interested in Evolving Your Habits to Rituals and would like to have an Inquiry Call, click the button below to my schedule and book now with me!
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